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Skip the fa-la-laing

Updated: Dec 6, 2021

I share this every year. And I will keep sharing it because this message is so important for people to hear.

Sometimes christmas sucks. It can be hard, and heavy, and painful. Everything is bigger at Christmas. All the joy gets bigger, but so does all the sadness.

I know a few people, again this year, that could use a Holiday Pass. And you know what? It's ok. We've all had years where we have felt like (or actually did 🙋‍) skip Christmas. And the world kept turning, no one held it against us, and eventually, things started to get better.

Grieving and loss, in many forms, are very real. Heartbreak, sickness, loneliness, weariness, hunger - all very real. Sleeping in the cold, struggling to keep a roof over your head, scraping nickels and dimes to feed your children, family strife, empty arms where little ones should be, and empty seats at the table. Too many reasons for the unbearable heaviness to even list. Yes, this is felt every day of the year, but seems to sting a little harder at Christmas when there is "joy" everywhere you look, but little to be felt in your heart.

Someone very wise once told me that sometimes self-care (and caring for those you love) can be nothing more than keeping yourself fed and watered.

So, if you need to skip the fa-la-la-ing, here's a pass. Keep yourself fed and watered, as best you can. I hope you can let some peace settle in your heart and feel the the love that is indeed all around. So, for those of us who can, let’s hold space for those who can’t. Many people are quite literally wondering how they will simply ‘get through’ the holidays. Sometimes just permission to not be okay is really all that someone needs.

This beautiful graphic is from Option B. You can find them at

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